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User blog:Mochizou/Anxious Heart
TRIGGER WARNING: ANXIETY In a small town lies Kaijo High School. It's an ordinary high school with ordinary students. At the school, students are required to join a club in order to pass the year. 8 students make up the Culture Club and this is their story... Culture Shock.'episode 4.'Anxious Heart The anxiety had followed her for over 2 years. Ash was 14 when she had her first panic attack, she was running late for school when she began to panic. She thought she was dying, it felt like she was. She couldn't breathe and for the next 20 minutes, she suffered in silence as no one was around to help her understand. She soon realised that she had suffered a panic attack and soon after the anxiety began. It was painful, she was an outgoing girl, always happy to be around others but the anxiety crushed that and reduced her to turtle in it's shell. Starting high school was terrifying for her, the idea of having to join a school club was even worse. When her classmate, Lizzy approached her about forming a club alongside Kieran and a few others, she was too nervous to say no. Meeting so many new people and having to spend time with them brought an onset of panic attacks initally. As she began to spend more time with this odd bunch of club members, she began to gain control of her anxiety and the panic attacks lessened. She also found solace in yaoi and her fujioshi lifestyle helped the anxiety issue further. She still suffered badly from it and situations where she would panic increased the risk of a panic attack. Today was one of these moments and she could only hope that Kieran could stall Lizzy and Yazzy long enough for her panic attack to run it's course. 'Kieran: '''OW! CUT IT OUT! '''Lizzy: '''Not until I'm satisfied '''Kieran: '''I'LL BE DEAD BY THEN '''Lizzy: '''That's what I'm holding out for! ''Lizzy has Kieran's arm twisted behind his back and his face shoved against the wall. She's already kicked him in the crotch and is planning more pain 'Yazzy: '''Maybe that's enough '''Kieran: '''I AGREE '''Lizzy: '''Not yet! '''Kieran: '''YAZZY! ASH! HELP ME ''Ash comes outside, her panic attack now over 'Ash: '''What's going on? '''Lizzy: '''I could ask you the same question '''Ash: '''What? '''Lizzy: '''How long you been doing the dirty with this one? '''Ash: '''That's stupid! Why on earth would I want to sleep with ''that 'Kieran: '''Thanks! '''Lizzy: '''Oh shut up! ''Lizzy twists Kieran's arm further 'Ash: '''Let him go, would you '''Lizzy: '''Fine! ''Lizzy reluctantly lets Kieran go and he falls to the floor 'Yazzy: '''Can we get started? We came over to co-ordinate with you, let you know what events we've planned so you can make posters and stuff for it. We've already wasted 20 minutes watching Lizzy beat up Kieran '''Ash: '''Sure, come on in ''Lizzy looks towards Kieran 'Lizzy: '''Get up! '''Kieran: '''It hurts ''Ash had never told anyone about her anxiety, despite wanting to tell someone. She had almost told Lizzy last year and was thinking about telling Kieran earlier when he opened up about his abuse but both times, her anxiety prevented her from doing so. Kaijo High School - Culture Club 'Cam: '''Is everyone here? '''Tori: '''Not everyone. Kieran's not here. '''Lizzy: '''He's in detention. The idiot fumbled up an attempt to flirt and ended up falling into the girls boobs. Let's just say that red face of embarrassment will be red for a long time. '''Cam: '''Anyone else? '''Gegi: '''Ash isn't here. '''Yazzy: '''Where is she? '''Damian: '''I don't know '''Lizzy: '''She was here earlier '''Gegi: '''Perhaps she's running late? '''Tori: '''Maybe '''Cam: '''Without Ash or Kieran, we can't find out how the decorations are coming along for the cultural festival but we can still get updates from everyone else. '''Tori: '''When did you become so formal and boring? '''Cam: '''When I was handed a huge task. Instead of being snarky, how about you and Damian tell me how many classes have picked events '''Damian: '''All the first year classes have chosen a stall and so have the majority of the third years. '''Tori: '''The second years have been the trickiest so far. '''Gegi: '''I'm not surprised. My class had a huge argument today trying to decide on a stall. '''Cam: '''Can you make sure they decide soon? '''Damian: '''Sure boss! '''Cam: '''Lizzy and Yazzy, how are you two doing? '''Yazzy: '''We've got some fun stuff planned '''Lizzy: '''Some ''very ''fun stuff '''Gegi: '''Why do you have an evil look on your face? '''Lizzy: '''No reason. '''Cam: '''Is that everything? '''Damian: '''I think so '''Cam: '''Good ''Cam slumps back into his chair and breathes a sigh of relief 'Cam: '''I hate doing all that formal stuff, that's not what this place it about. We can chill now. '''Tori: '''Thank god for that. ''The meetings are always the same. Eight friends hang out in a room under the guise that they are a culture club. It's an excuse to hang out for a while after school. There's been countless days where they've lost track of time and had cleaners knocking on the door to inform them go home before the school's locked up for the night. Today was another one of those days. The group chatted away the afternoon and were later joined by Kieran, who had finished detention by that point. By the time the school was being closed for the night, only four remained. Kieran, Lizzy, Cam and Gegi. '' '''Lizzy: '''What time is it? '''Gegi: '''About 7 '''Cam: '''How did it get so late? '''Kieran: '''I don't even know '''Gegi: '''My parents are going to be so mad. They hate when I stay out too late. '''Cam: '''Mine don't worry too much, but they get annoyed with me '''Lizzy: '''Mine don't really care '''Kieran: '''I can't really comment ''The four walk until they reach a corner 'Cam: '''Gegi and I are going off this way so we'll be saying goodbye now. '''Lizzy: '''I'll be going too. I live a few streets away from here. '''Cam: '''Well bye guys '''Lizzy & Kieran: '''Bye ''The four split up in three different directions. Cam and Gegi go off in one direction, Lizzy in the opposite and Kieran carries on straight ahead. Cam and Gegi live near to one another. It's always been that way. It was their close proximty that had caused Cam to realise his feelings for Gegi and vice-versa. They both loved each other but had never had the chance to tell the other. Everyone else knew except for these two 'Cam: '''It's nice weather out tonight '''Gegi: '''Yeh, it's not too cold for once ''They both awkwardly laugh 'Cam: '''You know out of everyone in the club, you're the person I'm closest too. '''Gegi: '''That can't be true '''Cam: '''It is. Damian has Tori, and Ash, Lizzy and Yazzy are usually always together, then there's Kieran who just does his own thing. You're the one I spend most of my time with '''Gegi: '''Aww '''Cam: '''I like it that way. '''Gegi: '''Yeh, me too ''Across town, Kieran's making his way home but decides instead to visit Ash since she never showed up to the club meeting. He wasn't sure if he should intrude but the thought of her being upset was too much. Beneath his flirty exterior, he's a selfless person when it comes to the feelings of others. As he walks up to her front door, he sees that is partly open 'Kieran: '''Ash? ''He opens the door and looks inside, there's no one else home, he hears a thud upstairs and immediately runs up to find out. Entering Ash's room, he sees her flailing around her room, almost as if in a panic. He runs over to her 'Kieran: '''Ash! Ash! Are you okay?! ''Ash is in the middle of another panic attack and Kieran's presence scares her further. She knows that he means no harm in being here but that fact that someone has seen her at her weakest scares her. 'Kieran: '''Ash, it's ok. Just breathe. With me, ok? Breathe ''He grabs hold of her and pulls her close in an attempt to sync their breathing. Despite Ash beginning to panic further, she soon begins to calm down and the panic attack soon passes by. At this moment, she burst into tears and breaks down. Kieran holds her as she cries. 'Kieran: '''It's ok. I've got you ''Lizzy's house was a decent size. Her parents had money there was no denying it. There was five of them in total. Mom, Dad and her two older brothers, of which both were at university. Her parents weren't bothered by her late arrival home. 'Lizzy: '''I'm home. '''Lizzy's Mom: '''Oh, I thought you were home hours ago. We're eating dinner come join us '''Lizzy: '''If I was home, why didn't you tell me about dinner? '''Lizzy's Mom: '''Good day? I've been busy today. '''Lizzy: '''Not to bad. Hey dad. '''Lizzy's Dad: '''Hi '''Lizzy: '''I've got good news, today at school-- '''Lizzy's Mom: '''Liz, did you hear about your brother getting a good mark on his dissertation? He's such a credit to this family '''Lizzy: '''Yeh, well I mean I-- '''Lizzy's Dad: '''Let's not forget your other brother, he's got top marks so far this year. '''Lizzy: '''Yeh ''It was like this everday. Despite being the loud, prominent one of the club, Lizzy was invisible at home. Category:Blog posts